Chapter 173July 24-25, 1959155

... ... ... ... Mother, I need Sujata like my very soul. It seems to me that she is a part of me, that she alone can help me break with this horrible past, that she alone can help me to love truly at last. I need peace so much, a quiet, PEACEFUL happiness – a base of happiness upon which I could use my strength to build, instead of always fighting, always destroying. Mother, I am not at all sure of what must be, but I know that Sujata is part of this realization.

That’s all, Mother. Forgive me, but I am so afraid. For how is this possible in the Ashram? What would people say?

Mother, my whole soul writes you this. I swear there is in me a single great need of Love, beauty, nobility, purity. And we would work for you together in joy at last.154 Your anxious child,

Signed: Satprem First penetration of the supramental force into the body.

Sri Aurobindo alive in a concrete and permanent subtle physical body.

(Letter from Mother to Satprem, on the road)

154Shortly afterwards, Satprem left on a journey and returned only two months later.