Chapter 4May 15, 1965

104 a year.

It doesn't matter, we're living in eternity.

Previously, I used to translate three or four lines every day; sometimes less, sometimes more, and it used to go very fast. But now, mon petit, (laughing) I have no time left for anything! It's traditional or agreed upon that I "must" take something in the afternoon to make a break between morning and evening – I never have the time! Those who are supposed to leave at 4 o'clock leave at 4:45.

You would need a police force near you...

Yes.

...someone with authority, pitiless, who would say, "Time is up, out you go!"

Yes, a police force.

And above all I shouldn't be asked, because if they come and tell me, "Oh, so-and-so wants to see you; oh, so-and-so has sent a letter... ," I can't very well answer, "Ah, no! Now I am resting"! It's a bit... It's not a pleasant feeling and the rest wouldn't be very restful. But it has reached the point (there are four secretaries, as you know) where one chap said, I'll shoot him – one of the four secretaries, because he didn't pass on the letters. So you understand (laughing), your police force would be in danger!

We can only smile, it's the best remedy – laugh and smile. We must learn to laugh, more and more.

We are still in the thick of a period of battle.

There are moments when everything seems to be going wrong, seriously wrong, and then the next minute, everything goes triumphantly well, then it starts going wrong again – it isn't steady.

At times, there is a sort of harmony in the functioning so perfect that it leaves you dumbfounded, then the next moment, everything appears to be disorganized. So I don't know if it's to make us more supple. It must be to make us plastic.

External circumstances, too: at times everything works out – everything works out with such benevolence and, really, extraordinary timeliness; then the next minute, people become increasingly stupid, malicious and unwilling to understand... (laughing) and sometimes the same people! And there are some who have extraordinary, remarkable experiences that point to an advance at full tilt, then they suddenly fall back into an unspeakable stupidity.

It's the hot and cold shower, to make us more supple.