Chapter 3March 11, 1964

in this world of Disorder. But while the experience was there, I knew there would be another one, which is yet to come (God knows when!), and which would join with this one to form a third. And it is that junction that will then probably cause something to be changed in the appearances.

When will it come? I don't know. But we shouldn't be in a hurry. Voilà.

* * * (Just before Satprem leaves, regarding the recent publication of "Sri Aurobindo or the Adventure of

Consciousness" at the Ashram, and its distribution:)

...What I wanted was to set a date, to get the book published – I am not particularly keen that people [here at the Ashram] should read it! Because I have a feeling that after some time (now I understand better), when the atmosphere is quite ready, it will do a very useful work over there [in Europe], very useful.

France is a black hole in the atmosphere.

Atmospheres are very interesting.... Yet there is an IMMENSE possibility there. But it is buried, as it were.

There are far more possibilities there than in England.

There is a possibility in Russia, too, but of a different nature – mystic, a great mystic possibility there. When the mystic spirit awakens there... It has been repressed, so... (gesture of explosion).

It seems they have now allowed baptisms [in Russia]: they've made a special organization for people who want to be baptized! A special place, maybe a building, I don't know, where all those who want to can be baptized. It used to be done secretly – now it will be a State organization. So those people had made progress, they had emerged from all the superstitions of the past, and now here's their new "progress": they fall back into the pit! They are taking up again the old burden of all the old superstitions....

I'll read you something.

It concerns an American who came here full of all the American ideas, who did a survey of everything (the way the services are organized and so on), and who sent me his report in which he says that everything lacks organization, a mental structure.... I didn't intend to answer him, but the day before yesterday, just when I was going to retire for the night, Sri Aurobindo told me insistently – he

Sri Aurobindo has told us (it's he himself who said it) and we are convinced by experience that above the mind there is a consciousness much wiser than the mental wisdom, and in the depths of things there is a will much more powerful than the human will.

All our endeavour is to make this consciousness and this will govern our lives and action and organise all our activities. It is the way in which the Ashram has been created. Since 1926 when Sri Aurobindo retired and gave me full charge of it (at that time there were only two rented houses and a handful of disciples) all has grown up and developed like the growth of a forest, and each service was created not by any artificial planning but by a living and dynamic need. This is the secret of constant growth and endless progress. The present difficulties come chiefly from psychological resistances in the disciples who have not been able to follow the rather rapid pace of the sadhana and the yielding to the intrusion of mental methods which have corrupted the initial working.

A growth and purification of the consciousness is the only remedy.

* * * (Then Mother refers to the preceding conversation, of March 7, and to her experience of the ananda of

progress in life.)

I feel it as something decisive, because, for me, things have changed. It's not one of those things that come and then go away.

Well... now we have to go farther. Perhaps that's what I meant when I said "another four years," because I was in a rather strange state when I came back from the balcony on the 29th.... Wait, I'll show you a photo: they have given me photos of that balcony.

(Mother goes and gets a photo,

then looks at it)

With the cloak flapping like a wing...

I wasn't seeing physically.... But that expression... that's the state I was in when I said (I was concentrated and something came out of here [gesture to the heart] and said to the Lord), "Well, we will wait another four years."

Four years, that means 1968. Sri Aurobindo said there would be a beginning of supramental manifestation in '67; so perhaps in '68 the two experiences will meet. It's possible.

The photo is clear.

An expression of yours that I didn't know.

That you didn't know...

You see, it isn't a woman, it isn't a man; very clearly there's neither woman nor man here.