Chapter 7January 28, 1970

(Mother listens to the English translation of the conversation of 13 December 1969, in which she spoke of a cure “without repression”: “What causes the repression is the idea of good and evil.... The infirmity of our consciousness is what creates this division.” Mother added that one has to “learn to disappear.” Satprem had proposed the publication of a few extracts in the “Notes on the Way.”)

Is it the end?

(To Nolini, in English:) You think it’s all right? It won’t create a great confusion?... I am not sure. They’re going to feel quite lost.

(silence)

(Satprem:) You go to the heart of the problem – to the heart of all problems.

Yes, but... (Mother laughs)

People have a thousand and one difficulties, but there is only ONE difficulty; there are a thousand and one facets but there’s only ONE problem. It’s clearly put here.

They’re going to be terrified!

(silence)

What should be said is that in this Consciousness where the two contraries, the two opposites are united, the nature of both changes. They don’t remain as they are. It’s not that they unite and remain the same: the nature of both changes. And that’s quite important. Their nature, their action, their vibration are completely different the minute they unite. It’s separation that made them what they are.

Separation must be done away with, then their very nature changes: it’s no longer “good” and “evil” but something else, which is complete. It’s complete.

(silence)

It’s on the borderline... all that is on the borderline.... When will THE Thing come?... I don’t know.

(Satprem first reads out to Mother his preface to the second edition of Sri Aurobindo or the Adventure

“The age of adventures is over. Even if we go to the seventh galaxy, we will go there helmeted and mechanised, and we will find ourselves exactly as we are: children in the face of death, living beings who are not too sure how they live or why, nor where they are going. On the earth, as we know, the times of Cortez and Pizarro are gone: a single Machine hems us in, the trap is closing. But, as always, it turns out that our darkest adversities are our best opportunities, and the obscure transition is only a transition leading to a greater light. That is why we are pushed to the wall and faced with the last exploration left to us, the ultimate adventure: ourselves.

“The signs abound, they are simple and obvious. The most important event of the sixties is not the trip to the moon, but the ‘trips’ on drugs, the great hippie migration, and the student unrest throughout the world – but where will they go? There is no more room on the teeming beaches, no more room on the bustling roads, no more room in the ever-growing anthills of our cities. The way out is elsewhere.

“But there are many kinds of ‘elsewheres.’ Those of drugs are uncertain and fraught with danger, and above all dependent on outer means – an experience ought to be obtainable at will and anywhere, in the marketplace as in the solitude of our room, or else it is not an experience but an anomaly or slavery. Those of psychoanalysis are limited, for the moment, to a few dimly lit caves, and above all lack that lever of consciousness which enables us to move about at will, as our own masters and not as helpless witnesses or sickly victims. Those of religion are more illumined, but they too depend on a god or a dogma, and above all confine us within one type of experience, for one can be a prisoner of other worlds as much as of this one – even more so....

Yes, yes.

“...In the end, the value of an experience is measured by its power to transform life; otherwise, we are before an empty dream or a hallucination.

“Sri Aurobindo leads us to a twofold discovery which we urgently need if we want not only to find a way out of our suffocating chaos, but also to transform our world. By following him step by step in his prodigious exploration – his technique of inner spaces, if we may say so – we are led to the most important discovery of all times, to the threshold of the Great Secret which is to change the face of this world, namely, that consciousness is power. Hypnotized as we are by the present ‘inescapable’ scientific conditions in which we were born, we seem to find hope only in an ever more enormous proliferation of machines, which will see better than we do, hear better than we do, calculate better than we do, heal better than we do – and finally perhaps live better than we do....

(Mother laughs)

“...We need to know that we can do better than they, and that this huge Machine which is stifling us can collapse as quickly as it came into being, if only we are willing to seize the lever of the true power and descend into our own hearts as methodical, rigorous and clearheaded explorers.

“Then we may discover that our splendid twentieth century was still the Stone Age of an apprentice.”

It’s very good, very good... it’s magnificent. That really has a dynamic force.

* * * Soon afterwards:

Not last night but the night before, for the first time I saw – it was the first time – Sri Aurobindo drive the car. He was driving the car, I was there right behind him, and then the whole world seemed to be there. But between me and Sri Aurobindo, that is to say, between the world and Sri Aurobindo, there was what looked like one of those screens at the front [a windshield], but it was a mat so that one couldn’t see through. I myself could see, but the others couldn’t, and I saw Sri Aurobindo at the wheel, and he was the one who was driving. He was... ageless, with an extraordinary power, and a MASTERY in the driving, extraordinary! And it was as if... he were beginning to drive the world.

I said to myself, “How come...?” It’s the first time. I see him almost every night, but always busy, going here and there, doing this or staying still or seeing people, or apparently doing nothing. But here, he was driving the car – it was the car of the world – and there was a screen so people wouldn’t see it was him.... The whole, entire world was at the back, and people didn’t know, but it was driven with extraordinary sureness and speed.

When I woke up, I had the impression that something had really changed.

It’s obviously the coming of the centenary [in 1972].... Still, there was a screen, but he was the one who was driving.

Now I understand my vision.

It was that force, that power in him... it was tremendous.

(silence)

It was a rather peculiar night.... An old friend of Amrita’s died in the night: Ganeshan. I didn’t know. And it was...

How can I really explain?... The body, the body consciousness was the consciousness of a dying body, and at the same time with the perfect knowledge that it wasn’t dying. But it was the consciousness of a dying body, with all the anguish, all the suffering, all those things, but there was the knowledge that it wasn’t this (Mother points to her own body) that was dying. And it lasted a long time: it lasted all night – he died very early this morning. Afterwards, I knew (only a few hours afterwards, when I was told that he had left), then I understood.... That man was very ardent in his devotion and he had long known that he was going to die; his sons had proposed to take him away for treatment – he said, “No, I want to die at the Ashram, I don’t want to leave the atmosphere....” And I understand why, because... you see, the consciousness was there helping him all along, he instantly had the reaction this body [Mother’s] would have, you understand? Which means he died in particularly favorable conditions. My body was like this (gesture of surrender) and saying, “All right. Lord, it’s as You will, I am quite ready.” At the same time, it perfectly had the knowledge: “But you aren’t dying!...” Like that.

But that’s how it was, it said, “Very well, if You have decided. You have decided....” And it knew. I