Chapter 4May 14, 1969

it only knew... how to go into immobility, go into silence, it would be enough. As soon as it does it...

But I am not quite sure (because it hasn’t tried to find out), not quite sure that all those pains it feels all over, all the time, aren’t coming from... aren’t the effect of all the bad wills. They are all over the earth, you know. And most of the time, they’re hardly conscious....

Why is it like this?... Why, why?... Will you tell me why this exteriorization began (not began: it’s here, on the earth) with this almost total Inconscient – the Inconscient, this almost total inertia? Why did it have to begin with this?... Why?

The mind has imagined all kinds of magnificent reasons, it builds constructions – that seems like childishness.... Why?

There’s the whole side of Buddhism, nihilism and so on, according to which (we can give a translation for children) the Supreme Lord made a mistake! (Mother laughs) He blundered, so... And then we’ll help Him get out of his blunder!

There’s the other extreme: it’s YOUR own stupidity that makes you feel it this way – but then, why do I have stupidity in me, where does it come from?

There is no doubt that everything is willed, everything has a meaning.

Yes, it’s certain. It’s certain.

That’s certain. And there’s... The impression is: we don’t understand because we are too small.

But why is this the result, this... suffering and suffering?...

(long silence)

We’ll see.

(For several days, Mother has been unwell: A “heart attack.”)

The movement is accelerating.

It was the turn of the heart, so the doctor forbade me to see people – but that’s not possible. The day before yesterday, I was busy; yesterday, I saw a few people... altogether, it gets to be some fifty people! Fantastic.

Yes, it began on Sunday (I saw you on Saturday the 10th, and it began on Sunday). It started with a