Chapter 5February 15, 1969

(A note from Satprem to Mother)

Sweet Mother,

I would have like to under-

stand what your look was

saying this morning....

With love

S.

(Mother’s answer overleaf)

I would rather not

write it.

M.

Just one thing, this atmosphere, this [superman] Consciousness is very active, and active like a mentor, as I already told you. And it’s going on. One of these last few mornings, for a few hours early in the morning, it was... Never, never had the body been so happy! It was the complete Presence, absolute freedom, and a certitude: these cells, other cells (gesture here and there showing other bodies), it didn’t matter, it was life everywhere, consciousness everywhere.

There is something wholly independent of our aspiration, our will, our effort... wholly independent. And this something appears to be absolutely all-powerful, in the sense that none of the body’s difficulties exists. At such times, everything disappears. Aspiration, concentration, effort... no use at all. And it’s the DIVINE SENSE, you understand, that’s what having the divine sense means. During these few hours (three or four hours), I understood in an absolute way what having the divine consciousness in the body means. And then, this body, that body, that other body... (gesture here and there, all around Mother), it doesn’t matter: it moved about from one body to another, quite free and independent, aware of the limitations or the possibilities of each body-absolutely wonderful, I had never, ever had this experience before. Absolutely wonderful. It left because I was so busy that... and it didn’t leave because it had just come to show “how it is” – that’s not it: it’s because life and the organization of life (gesture like a truckload being dumped) engulf you.

I know it’s there (gesture in the background), I know it is, but... But that’s a transformation as I understand it! And clearly, in people it could express itself-not something vague, clearly – in this man, in that woman, in... (same gesture here and there), quite clearly. And with a Smile!...

The cells themselves were saying their effort to be transformed, and there was a Calm.... (How can I explain this?...) The body was saying its aspiration and will to prepare itself, and, not asking but striving to be what it should be; all that always with this question (it’s not the body that asks it, it’s... the environment, those around -the world, as if the world were asking the question): “Will it continue, or will it have to dissolve?...” The body is like this (gesture of abandon, hands open upward), it says, “What You will, Lord.” But then, it knows the question is decided, and One doesn’t want to tell it – it accepts. It doesn’t lose patience, it accepts, it says, “Very well, it will be as You will.” But That which knows and That which doesn’t answer is... something that can’t be expressed. It is... yes, I think the only word that can describe the sensation it gives is “an Absolute” – an Absolute. Absolute. That’s the sensation: of being in the presence of the Absolute. The Absolute: absolute Knowledge, absolute Will, absolute Power... Nothing, nothing can resist. And then this Absolute (there’s this sensation, concrete) is so merciful! But if we compare it with all that we regard as goodness, mercy... ugh! that’s nothing at all. It’s THE Mercy with the absolute power and... it’s not Wisdom, not Knowledge, it’s... It has nothing to do with our process. And That is everywhere, it’s everywhere. It’s the body’s experience. And to That it has given itself entirely, totally, without asking anything – anything. A single aspiration (same gesture, hands open upward), “To be capable of being That, what That wills, of serving That” – not even “serving,” of BEING That.

But that state, which lasted for several hours... never had this body, in the ninety-one years it’s been on earth, felt such happiness: freedom, absolute power, and no limits (gesture here and there and everywhere), no limits, no impossibilities, nothing. It was... all other bodies were itself. There was no difference, it was only a play of the consciousness... (gesture like a great Rhythm) moving about.

So there.

Apart from that, all the rest is as usual.

(long silence)

But apart from that, the work is becoming more and more exacting: the number of people is increasing a lot, and I see them for a longer time too – everyone has more to say But I very clearly feel (that is, the body very clearly feels) that it’s part of the training.

It seems to be like this: the body must hold out, otherwise, too bad, it will be for another time.